


Falling Head Over Heels

by orphan_account



Category: Asagao Academy: Normal Boots Club
Genre: Daily life at Asagao Academy, Flirting, Kitchen instead of cafeteria, M/M, Minor Injuries, Realisation, an unnecessary amount of swearing, cheesy af, confessing, crackfic, falling over, fluff at the end, terrible cliches, unrealistic shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-04-01 12:23:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13998282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: This time, Ian had taken his flirting game with the ever-oblivious Caddy just a little too far.And after falling head over heels, quite literally, out of bed, his morning could only get worse... Right?





	Falling Head Over Heels

**Author's Note:**

> _I’ve been waiting to post this for almost 20 days now. Yeah, that's right, I reactivated my account for this fic. I've spent over five hours on this shit, even after I’d finished doing laundry, when I have a fuck tonne of assignments due soon. What a great start to the year, eh? Enjoy the first terrible fanfic of my return to the world of AO3. =)_

It was a slow Saturday at Asagao Academy. The inclement weather was certainly a contributing factor to the dreary nature hanging around Bluebell House. Many students had cancelled their off-campus plans for the day in favour of oversleeping in their warm, cozy and comfortable beds. 

One student intending to do as such was Ian Macleod, whose morning alarm went off with a blaring and irritating bleep. He groaned awoke in confusion, realising something wasn’t quite right in his sleepy haze. He couldn’t put his finger on it though.

_What the actual fuck?_

The third-year drearily stumbled out of the top bunk, still wrapped in oodles of blankets. His footing slipped on the ladder, and he went tumbling head over feet in a dizzy spin, thumping face-first onto the carpet. 

Ian winced, and put two fingers to his forehead. They came back with a slight tinge of red. 

“Shit.” he cursed with a soft grumble. 

Then he realised that it was a Saturday. And it was only 10AM. 

“SHIT!” he yelled with a comparatively louder grumble this time.

A knock came from the wall next door, impolitely implying for him to shut up so early in the morning. 

Ian flipped the bird at the wall, and whacked the snooze button. He started to try and speed up his mental processes by beginning to piece together what was responsible for his already terrible morning. Jeff had to be at soccer training, because the uniform that had been laid out on the chair was missing. But Jeff’s sleep schedule was so faultless that he never used the alarm.

_So why the fuck did the alarm go off?_

He wiped the sleep from his eyes and decided to go fetch a bandaid. 

~~~~~~

 

It may have been raining outside, but _fuck_ , Caddy was feeling great. 

The young Brit had woken up at the bright and early time of 10:59AM, and had already skipped his way down to the kitchen to get some food. He whistled a Spice Girls tune as he spun his bowl of uncooked oats into the microwave, pressing the buttons in an overdramatic fashion. 

And if anything could make his day better, it was seeing the look of absolute death on Moosey’s face as he trudged into the kitchen bay, with a single pink bandaid sprawled across his forehead.

“Bloody hell, what happened to you?!” he cackled with joy, almost spilling the glass of orange juice he was holding all over the counter. “Looks like you’ve had a wonderful morning! You’re glowing, as always. You know, you’d give Jared a run for his money some day!”

Ian gave him his trademarked ‘ _Fuck You_ ’ glare as he opened the kitchen cupboard above him, whacking his head on the corner of the door in the process. Caddy burst out roaring like a hyena, until he realised that Ian’s head was actually bleeding in a completely separate spot. The tired boy didn’t even react, and just stared out soullessly into the distance with an annoyed sigh.

“Moosey? You uh… you a’right there?”

“… This isn’t even the first time this has happened today, asshat. Get me a bandaid.”

Caddy laughed again, and decided to jest with the annoyed gamer. “Get your own fucking bandaid, I’m not your servant”

“Mhm, you’re not my servant, you’re my _bitch_. Bandaid. Now.”

Caddy gasped in feigned shock and walked away to the medical cupboard, as the two started up their usual playful banter.  
 _Two can play at that game_ , Caddy thought with a chuckle to himself.  
After retrieving a bandaid, he jumped right over the counter and slid all the way up into Ian’s personal space. 

“Well, _princess Ian_ , I guess I’ll have to help you out because you’re so fucking useless at everything,” he mocked, peeling the paper off the bandaid and slapping it onto the cut. 

“There. The perfect bandaid for a pathetic little princess.” Caddy started to laugh, but then realised the look of sheer horror on Ian’s face. Ian’s breath hitched and neither of them dared to breathe. Caddy felt a strange tingling sensation break out across his cheeks like the plague, the rest of his body frozen unexpectedly. This had never happened before.

“Um,” Caddy croaked out.   
_Why is my voice so hoarse all of a sudden? What is this bullshit?_

“James?” Ian spoke calmly. 

_When did his voice get so sexy? Wait, what the fuck?!_ Caddy gaped, lost for words.

In a sudden flurry of dizzy colour, Ian spun Caddy around and pinned him onto the counter with a smile. Caddy accidentally let out a girlish squeal as his head swum with confusion, panic, and something shockingly new and different. He flushed bright-pink, and accidentally bucked his hips up into Ian’s knee, rubbing across his crotch. He dared not move an inch as he held his breath once more. 

_Whoa. What?_

“Game over, _bitch_ ,” Ian laughed into Caddy’s ear, “Who’s the princess now?”. The American smiled as he walked off, Caddy’s glass of orange juice and bandaid in hand, leaving the Brit to take his place in staring out into nothingness, realisation setting in.

~~~~~~

Caddy poked at his now-cold oats with his spoon, drowning himself in his inner ramblings. He had tried to look for Ian, but seeing as he was nowhere in the general vicinity of the kitchen after he had recollected his bearings, he had decided to take his cold-porridgey-oats to the table where Yungtown and Wallid were seated.

_What does any of this all mean? I don’t…_

“What’s the matter, my bro, you seemed alright this morning? Is everything okay?” Luke interrupted Caddy’s thought train with a caring pat on the shoulder. 

“Yeah, you seem pretty FaZe-clan, I mean, fazed out” Wallid piped up with a wink. Luke rolled his eyes.

“I’m alright, just… thinking.” Caddy managed to stumble out. 

“… Was it Ian?” Yungtown asked softly. 

“What? No, why would I give a flying fuck about that twat? He’s a stupid son of a bitch, and you know…” the Brit trailed off, his memory flashing back to just a few moments earlier. 

_Why did I even get that fucking close to him in the first place?_

He groaned, face-palming and stabbing the edge of his bowl. “How did you know anyway?!”

“We saw what happened earlier. We were sitting right here, you know.” Wallid chirped, making his best attempt at a Lenny face, as he stuffed more pancake into his already filled gob.

James froze and dropped his spoon into the sludge below. 

“… If magical-girl here could be a little less blunt here” Luke whacked Wallid hard in the arm.  
“Hey, I’m just being honest! It’s fine Caddy, don’t worry about it.”  
“I guess you’ve got a point. Look, it’s okay bro, you can talk to us. We’re here for you. And-”

But Caddy was no longer listening, for It was at that moment he saw Ian’s hooded shadow stride across the large kitchen, making all attempts to avoid anyone. Caddy instantly bubbled up with innumerable unidentifiable feelings that he needed to satiate.

_Oh here we go, get fucking ready, you slimy shit._

“Yeah… Maybe later, thanks a-anyway guys, I’ll see you around” he hurled himself out of the plastic chair. With a mixture of fear, anger and something perhaps a bit sexual, he ran towards Ian and punched him in the face. 

“WHAT THE FUCK?” Ian yelled, as the kitchen was filled with silence.

Luke and Wallid shared a shocked glance, before scurrying over to restrain the two from tearing each others’ heads off. 

“What do you think you’re playing at, ey?!” Caddy shouted as Luke pulled him away with all his might.

“You’re the one who started it, _bitch_ , why’d you set off my alarm?!”

“Why’d _I_ set off your alarm? _What fucking alarm?!_ ”

“You piece of shit,” Ian wiped at his chin. More blood. _Great_.   
“I’m not a fucking punch-bag!!” 

“Well I’m sorry but none of this would have happened if you weren’t a stupid little piece of shit!”

“You’re just a sore loser! Fuck you!”

Wallid had managed to lug the fired-up Moose around the corner by the time that Caddy had started searching for his gun in his backpack. Luke just sighed, and motioned for everyone watching to continue eating breakfast. 

~~~~~~

Ian stared up at the Nintendo-BS that he was holding above him, with multiple pink bandaids and ice-packs sprawled across his face. It had not been a good day so far. 

Jeff swung open the door and gave his usual cheery greetings to Ian.   
“Hey Ian, I’m back! What’s up?” he smiled.

“Stop dripping water on the carpet.”

“Not my fault it’s raining,” Jeff laughed, as he placed his soccer ball on the rack. “Is everything okay? I heard about what happened.”

“Yeah, I’m covered in bandaids now, big deal.”

“No, I meant….” 

A silence loomed around the two of them. Jeff sighed.

“… Look, Caddy really hasn’t taken this well. Whatever you think you’re doing, it’s probably best that you sort it all out.”

“ _I_ didn’t do anything, _he_ posusm-punched _me_! He’s being a little tease again and my heart can’t stand it anymore. _AND_ he set my alarm off this morning to prank me-”

“Actually… I may have left that alarm on. Sorry.”

“What? But you _never_ set alarms!”

“I forgot to turn it off after my date with Peebs last night, my apologies, really.”

Ian groaned. “Shit. I blamed Caddy for that, had a go at him this morning. To be fair, he started it though. I cut my head for the second time in one day and he wouldn’t be rational about getting me a fucking bandaid.”

“Why did you think it was Caddy in the first place? He… He doesn’t even have the keys to our room. That’s a preeeetty weird conclusion to come to.”

“I… I don’t know, I was concussed and sleepy, alright? My thoughts always default to him anyway.”

“Well, I think that maybe it’s time for you to go and talk to James. I think that might be a good idea, to apologise to him. _And_ to tell him how you really feel, because you haven’t stopped talking about him for months on end, and it’s really bugging me now. I even managed to get with _Austin the innocent_ , of all people, before you’ve even gotten anywhere near telling Caddy.”

“I can’t though.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m infatuated with that son of a bitch. And I went way too far this time. There’s a point where playing around becomes sexual tension. And I think his dopey British brain has finally picked up on it. I’m totally screwed.”

“Really? You think he hasn’t noticed?”

~~~~~~

“You’d think I would have noticed!” James grumbled, as he threw the tennis ball at the wall. 

Jimmy looked up from his bowl of chilli-flavoured instant noodles and sniffled.

“Well, I don’t know. Everyone else thought you had noticed. Had you really not noticed?”

“I don’t know, maybe? I thought it was all a bit of fun. I never really thought of us like _that_ before. I just like screwing with him-“

Jimmy snickered. 

“Not like that, you little arsehole!”

Jimmy snickered again.

“UGH. I can’t even think of good insults anymore, what has the world come to.”

Jimmy snickered once more.   
“I think you know what it’s _come_ to” He wiggled his eyebrows.

Caddy threw the tennis ball at Jimmy.

“Ow! Okay, okay! Wow, you’ve become increasingly more violent, just chill for a second, I’m kidding.”

There was silence, until Caddy calmly spoke up.  
“… When did you know you were gay?”

Jimmy smiled, and gave Caddy a look of genuine empathy.  
“I guess there was a point where I just looked back on everything I had been feeling in the past, and realised what it all actually meant. And then I did a little bit of research, and came to terms with how I felt. It took time, but I had Luke to help me get through all of that. One step at a time. I mean, you don’t get this fabulous overnight, you know what I’m saying?”

Caddy chuckled, and rested his head back on the wall.   
“To be honest, looking back… I’ve had… _fleeting_ thoughts about boys. It’s not like _that_ thought hasn’t crossed my mind. I mean, I’ve always dismissed it as being irrelevant subconscious crap, but then Ian comes along and…. now that I think about it…”

Caddy thought more about it. And then he thought some more. Ian’s hair, the way it curled upwards. His silvery eyes that glistened in the light. The way he would act all smug like a smart-ass on the outside, but would occasionally show the concern that he held deep down for others. The way he ate spaghetti with a spoon like a dork. That pout… Then Caddy thought about _other_ things…

He gulped loudly.   
“…I… I think I might be having a realisation about Ian.”

“Well okay. Maybe you should talk to him about it.”

“He’ll just take it as a joke. Everything we do is a joke. What if he doesn’t actually mean it that way?”

“Puh-lease. Trust me, his gay-ass won’t stop talking about you. He’s obsessed with you.”

Caddy felt his heart thump loud in his chest, his breath quickening its pace just at hearing those words. His lungs expanded like fireworks as some glimmer of hope sparked in his brain. Yes, this was new. This was a good feeling. He wanted more of knowing that Ian actually cared, yes please. 

“I need to talk to Ian.”

~~~~~~

Ian’s cellphone buzzed on the bedside table below the bunk.

All conversation between Jeff and said person ceased. 

“Oh no.” Ian rolled over and moaned into the pillow. “Shit. Why, why, why… What am I going to do, Jeff?!” 

“Don’t worry, it might not be him.”  
Jeff picked up the phone and checked the lock screen.  
“Okay nevermind, it’s him.”

Ian bolted upright in the bed and tumbled down the ladder, making sure not to fall this time.  
“What does it say?”

“He wants to meet you in the common room. Now.”

“Fuck.”  
Ian’s heart sank with a feeling of dread. He couldn’t confess. How could he? He was terrified. What if he loses Caddy forever? Could he live with that? He was fine with just playing this stupid back-and-forth teasing game for the rest of eternity. He didn’t want to risk completely fucking this over. His mind raced as he threaded his hands through his hair. 

“Look, just tell him how you feel. Caddy may be a dick sometimes, but he’s not a bad person,” Jeff tried to reassure Ian, with a pat on the back. “You can do this. Heck, if I could do it with Peebs, you can too. Just go for it, Ian.”

Ian closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he grabbed his Hidden Block jacket and hurried nervously towards the common room.

~~~~~~

Ian opened the door to the tiny communal gathering space, to see Caddy sitting cross-legged on the couch inside, hands in his lap. As soon as he had realised who had entered, the Brit stood up and inhaled sharply, standing to attention.

Ian tried to will his heart to shut up and stop being so loud, and cursed under his breath.

“Look, James, I’m sorry about what happened, about the alarm, and this-“

“I like you.”

 

“What?”

Ian felt lightheaded all of a sudden.

“I’m sorry about punching you. And, I think I might have feelings for you.”

Ian fainted, head hitting the floor once more.

~~~~~~

When he woke up, Ian was in the school infirmary. His vision blurred and his head spun circles as he struggled to make sense of anything in the harsh, blinding light. He winced as he felt a sting in his left arm, and a throbbing pain in multiple places on his forehead. The only thing he could hear was said light buzzing, and the pitter-patter of rain on the tin ceiling. The rest of the room was dark.

“You look like you’ve been in a war.”

Ian jumped in shock as Nurse McPasta loomed over his face. 

“Your friend ran away. Put this on your cuts-slash-bruises once in the morning and once at night.”

The creepy figure handed him a small silver tube, and drifted away into the shadows. 

Ian sat up to ask more questions about why he was here, but the nurse had already disappeared into thin air.

_Fucking weird._

But it was then that shock started to set in again. 

_Oh my god._   
_Did James…. No, that can’t be right._

He jumped dizzily to his feet and ran down the corridor, looking frantically for Caddy. He zoomed past corners and hurried down hallways until he found the Brit walking slowly beside a wall lit with quaint shell-shaped lights.

“Caddy!” He gasped, struggling for air, finally slowing down. Caddy immediately spun around, and rushed over to stabilise Ian, making sure that he didn’t fall over and faint again. 

“Ian, whoa, hang on a minute. Slow down for a second!” 

“Sorry- I- had to- had to find- you” he panted, as he regained his breath.

“It’s alright, I was walking slowly on purpose. Just take a moment to breathe yeah?”

Ian nodded. Caddy could see that the other boy was tense, so he tried to calm him down a little by lightening the mood.  
“That nurse is fucking creepy though, I decided to save myself, but linger around _just_ long enough to ensure that he got the job done and murdered you properly.”

Ian’s breath had finally slowed. “Thanks for leaving me there alone then, you asshole.”

Both of them giggled, as they settled down in the warm light of the hallway.

Caddy became very aware of how he was currently holding Ian, arm around his shoulder and hand looming right above his chest. He began to stammer, and blush just a tad. But then he heard Ian’s heart beating: he noticed that it had slowed down earlier, but now it began to pick up pace once more. 

“I….” Caddy began, but Ian took his hovering hand in his, and closed the distance, placing it against his beating chest. 

“James, you fucking idiot. How could you not have noticed?” Ian laughed, sliding his other hand over to Caddy’s back, squeezing him into a tight hug. 

Both of the boys sighed with relief, and smiled giddily. They were both just content to bask in each other’s embrace. 

Ian finally piped up, nervously but with a hint of courage.   
“Is it okay if I kiss you? I mean, you don’t have to, I don’t want to rush things, you’re probably really new to all this and-“

James moved his hand up from Ian’s chest to cup the other's soft cheek, and stared at his lips with glazed eyes. He felt Ian’s breath hitch, just like it had earlier in the kitchen. With a smile, Caddy slowly took Ian’s top lip in his, and closed his eyes. He felt his body tingle excitedly once more as he felt the other boy push back with confidence, pulling slowly and gently at his bottom lip, tilting his head with a soft hum.

_Fuck yes, this is how it’s supposed to be._

Their lips parted, but they kept their foreheads together, bandaids and all. Caddy sighed contentedly, as they felt each others’ breaths becoming more stable and rhythmically synced. Ian brought his hand up to stroke the back of James’ ragged tufts of hair. With blissful, lidded eyes, Ian whispered.

“Fuck, I’ve been waiting so long for that, you have no idea.” 

“Mhm. I think I like this. Again, _princess Ian_.” Caddy cooed. 

This time, Ian smashed Caddy’s lips onto his with a heavy breath, lips wet and tongue prying. Caddy willingly obliged, snaking his arms around Ian’s hips, pulling them together. The fiery passion made both of their heads spin with excitement, with Ian taking charge. Caddy moaned just a bit, as the kiss became softer, and more gentle once again. 

When they parted, they both smiled at each other. Caddy took Ian’s hand in his, and they began to walk down the hallway.

“I’ll escort the precious princess back to his room. I don’t want him fainting and bonking his head on the floor again,” Caddy smirked.

“Punch me or call me that again, and I’ll steal your gun and shoot you between the eyes.”

“I reckon that’s fair, actually. So what was up with the alarm then?”

“It was Jeff. I don’t know why I blamed you to be honest.”

“Probably because you couldn’t stop thinking about me.”

“Actually, that’s pretty accurate.”

Caddy guffawed and squeezed Ian’s hand tighter, who laughed warmly.

“So… how do you feel about all of this?” Ian asked.

Caddy smiled. “I’m actually feeling alright. I’ve been reflecting on it all, and I think I’m okay with it. I’m still finding my way though. One step at a time.”

“I’m glad, really. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable at any moment, okay? Always let me know. You set the pace.”

“I may be thick sometimes, but I’m not that thick, you bastard.”

They reached Ian and Jeff’s room, giggling happily.

“I’m glad we talked, James.” Ian said sincerely, as they stopped right outside the door. 

“I’m glad too.” Caddy leaned over and pecked Ian lightly on the lips, where they lingered still for just a couple of seconds. Both of them smiled, and wished each other goodnight. 

Things were going to be okay. 

Ian opened the door, as giddy as a goat and as love-stricken as he’d ever been… and tripped down from cloud nine on nothing at all but sheer clumsiness, falling right onto his face.

**Author's Note:**

> what a terrible fic this is somebody kill me lol


End file.
